I'm not sure if this is a universal thing that all parents remain silent about or if it is just me because Craig has always worked on Christmas. But hey, I really am an expert in what not to do and how to improve the situation. If like me Christmas has been a challenging day, read the tips below and see if any of them may help to bring a little sunshine to your day.
13) Make Christmas Eve special. Make up a Christmas Eve box that guides the day as it is a loooong day for parents as well as children. Try to have this day free of too many last minute things and focus on family time together. And make sure the kids are really active so you can spend a couple of hours chilling by yourself of with your partner before getting the presents out to place under the tree.
12) Play-straight-away gifts are great for toddlers and preschoolers. They want to play RIGHT NOW not wait to get the gift out of the packaging. As an expert in undoing ALL the ties Christmas morning I would encourage all parents to think about packaging issues that could arise. My worst Christmas morning was when I had 3 children, Lucy being only 5 months old. A screaming-without-ceasing 5 month old. Craig worked day shift, so we got up at 5am, opened the presents and he left for work. And so the day of crying began. That is for all of us: a desperate-to-open-all-the-things 4 year old, a just-turned-2 year old who was over Christmas before it began, screaming Lucy, and me. I wish I knew then what I know now because my choices would have been very different! No packing ties would have been number 1.
11) If packaging will be an obvious issue open up presents, undo almost all of the ties, take off stick tape and then return item to the box (as the gifts are purchased.) Many people don't return the items to the boxes and choose wrap as-is. I find that the boxes do make the gifts much easier to wrap so I usually return them. This also helps keep pieces together when multiple children are opening gifts.
10) Make sure ALL electronics that require charging are charged on Christmas Eve. As you purchase these items add them to a list as a reminder. I will be setting it as a reminder with an alarm on my iPhone. This is also the time to put batteries in gifts that require them too. These will be the last gifts I wrap. And hopefully the only ones I wrap Christmas Eve. Speaking positively here, history tells me a much different story…..
9) If one parent is working Christmas Day make sure the children are aware of this well in advance and explain how this will fit into the day. Craig FINALLY has a Christmas off this year! But I think it is a first and the early years with little ones were a shocker. With older kids around to remind the younger kids what is happening it has been easier. The key is preparation when one parent has to do part/all of Christmas alone because it's all about expectations. When you plan you can clearly see what won't work which can make the day flow better because you won't be trying do fit things in that are impossible.
8) For Christmas Day, have a washing basket per child close to the present opening area, to place gifts in as they are opened. This can help stop mix-ups, lost items, and parts of gifts getting accidentally thrown out with the wrapping. The best thing about this system is that the special new items can be kept all together for an extended period for special play.
7) Christmas can be very overwhelming for some children. Try not to buy too much, and open gifts at the child's pace, which may mean not opening all the gifts at once. Perhaps open one or two, then have breakfast for example. Know your children and respond according to their needs, not the wants of everyone else.
6) Keep some of the regular daily rhythms if possible. If you can, plan for regular naps and try to do some of the regular things your family normally does, like brushing teeth after breakfast, and stories before bed. Tell them leading up to the day that these things will still happen. This will help children who are a bit anxious to remain calm. It is very easy to assume that Christmas is all excitement for everyone. Sometimes it's just not. If your child really struggles with changes to routines write down an ordered list of what will happen on the day so that they are prepared. For younger children who can't read, staple a few blank pages together and sit with your child to write events of the day at the bottom of the pages, encouraging them to draw a picture to accompany (like a transition book.) Read through this 'book' a few nights leading up to Christmas.
5) Remember: walk away and breathe. This could be applied to many of the situations I hear about post Christmas. It is one day. It is one very-high-pressure-too-overwhelming day. Your children may be much more badly behaved or say ungrateful things. Relatives that have had too much to drink may say unkind things. You may have to be around people whom you don't like all that much. What ever it is, just remember to walk away and breathe. You probably don't want to remember yourself as the crazy person at the party.
4) Remember the day should be fun, but meltdowns can occur very easily if it's all too much. This will depend on your child. All children are different, so will respond differently to the excitement. I have one that thrives on the newness and spontaneity of Christmas, while others I can guarantee will be in tears as they shower in the evening because it is all too much. Never place another's judgement before your own when considering your children: you know them best. If it is all spiralling out of control at a family event, leave, or go for a walk around the block with your child. If the opening of gifts is not going well, take a break and have breakfast or go outside to play. See a problem, find a solution. If others are terribly offended, perhaps they don't know your children (or you) as well as they think they do. Repeat to yourself "there is no have to, only choice," and then make the best choice for all concerned. After all is said and done, you will be the one going home with your child/ren and living with the consequences.
3) Supervise carefully. Casualty in a hospital is very busy at Christmas time! And as you probably don't want to be visiting don't assume that new toys will entertain them enough to give you a break, or think all the other parents hanging around will be watching your kids. Other parents have their own kids to watch, who may be finding Christmas a more difficult time than your children. This was the big shock about being a parent at Christmas. It was no longer a relaxing time all about me. It turned into very hard work. Fun. But hard work, even harder than normal because the kids are very tired from not enough sleep leading up to Christmas and all the new items, like skateboards or roller blades that they are not quite used to yet.
2) Plan for the exhaustion. I'm talking parents here! Christmas demands a lot from parents and by the time it's Christmas morning I'm sure I'm not the only one who is all too tired. Then there is food preparation, supervision of over-excited children, not to mention opening boxes and clearing mess. Craig and I plan times in the day for us to get a break. For us this means: rules like 'no present opening before parents have a cup of something caffeinated in their hands' and afternoon movie time, parents choice. This is definitely the day to be firm and make sure the kids are aware well in advance of the expectations. If we let the kids decide on the movie for example, there would be war on Christmas day, even though on a regular day they have little problem coming to agreed decisions. On this over-the-top too-exciting day it takes very little for craziness to take hold.
1) Plan for Boxing Day. Ahhh boxing day. I remember boxing day before kids. The resting and relaxing, maybe a swim or a trip to the beach, and definitely left overs. Some people still claim to have a day like this with kids, and I am more than jealous. Boxing Day can be horrible around here. The excitement is over, everyone is tired, there is too much cleaning up to do and every child wants a parent's attention with one of their new toys. This year I have planned a little to avoid some of the problems and will brief the kids on our expectations well before Christmas. They are usually really great if we explain problems and tell them our plan. I think it's the we-are-a-team thing and I will be using it to our advantage.
So these are a few of the plans that I will be putting into place for our family in the hope of an amazing Christmas.
What tips do you have for making a happy and calm Christmas?
Jen.x
No comments:
Post a Comment