Made brave

The last couple of years have been hard. Challenging. 

And there have been times when I've wondered through tears if I really could do all of what had been asked of me. In truth I very much thought I couldn't do all I had to do.

"I'm not strong enough!"
"I can't do this!"
"It's too much for one person!"
"How can anyone live without sleep!"
"I'm failing them!"
"I am so alone!"

As someone who once said I was completely happy with one child, and had no desire to ever have another, I am now in a place that I never dared imagine. 

Over time the journey has seen loss of friends, loss of employment, loss of dignity, loss of hope, and a loss of the image of who I thought I was. 

But.

As I now come out the other side, yes still facing challenges, but feeling a sense of overcoming and return to a new normalcy, I value this journey I have been on.

Because I am now stronger.
Because I am now braver.
Because I am now a better parent.
Because I am now a better teacher.
Because I now know who my true friends are.
Because I have let go of things that don't matter.
Because I now value things I didn't before.
Because I now know I AM capable of more.

And because of a thousand other things I either took for granted or wasted or learned along the way. 

The me I am now is not the me I was then. 

I am grateful beyond words. 

Even if there were many times I cried in the dark searching for a way out. I'm glad the only way out, was to go through.

To those now walking out into the waves, beyond imagining, my prayers are with you.

May you be made brave too.

Jen x