It probably began even earlier in a more slow and steady way, when we moved into this house four years ago. But adding a fifth child really encouraged me to look for more and more ways to simplify and streamline.
It has certainly been an interesting journey.
There has been so much given away, thrown out, or re-purposed into something functional for our family. Hard work doesn't even begin to touch the strength of words needed to describe the journey. I have been relentless. I have often missed sleep. Okay, in all honesty, I rarely get the amount of sleep I need and Craig thinks I lack the ability to relax. This need for constant activity has certainly fuelled my search for a way to do the everyday better, in the hope of having more time to just be with my lovely family. Minus the stress.
In many ways I have achieved what I set out to for my family. Organising and simplifying certain areas has made for a more smooth running household. The study overhaul has been fantastic. It is so very used in a house hold of such creatives and many of us involved in schooling. The laundry renovation has quite literally changed the way I think about washing. I would often dread it and hated being in the room, and now it is almost never messy and I can't help but smile every time I reach to open my bright red cupboard, that only holds exactly the things we use (and no more.) The mud room makes all the school stuff manageable, and with four at school, findable. The bedrooms, playrooms and living areas are now easier to clean up, and I even know exactly where everything is in our storage room. There is still much to be done, but I do look back gratefully, happy that simplifying is a journey we have been on.
But a little while ago I realised that in all the minimising and simplifying there was something that was somewhat lost and forgotten in our home.
Us.
In trying to create space, free up counters, see skirting boards and generally stop being a slave to all the stuff, I realised that I lost a little bit of what actually made our home feel like us. I lost a little of what made it feel like home to me.
Now, I know that it's the people that make the home, not the things. And that is very true. But there is also that moment when I walk into some houses that instantly gives me that it's-so-them-! feeling, and I really love it. It has nothing to do with cleanliness or organisation or the colour palette they have chosen.
They feel comfortable in the space.
And it fits their life perfectly.
That's just it, isn't it? A home should be there to serve the needs of the family and people in it, not the other way around. That's what I've discovered I have really been searching for in my journey towards simplicity: a home that is exactly what we need for us to be a family, without the excess that creates wasted time.
I realise now that this journey is not only about removing and making 'less.' Part of the journey is about making sure that our home fits our lifestyle and the things we love to do and the comfort that makes home feel like home. And what's more I need to recognise that I have this wonderful place and be grateful for it.
When considering my real family, not the imaginary one it would be more convenient to have, trying to pare back all-the-things, leaving no room for forgetting, tired, late, messy hobbies, fun and crazy, really isn't the right thing for me to do. We need room for error. We need to have reserves. We need 6 laundry baskets and a Costco shelf that is full at the start of a term, because our life just doesn't run smoothly without them. And I need a sewing table sitting right in the middle of our main living area. Because I just do. It makes for not only beautiful handmade items, but is also for sharing a passion with my little ones, while enabling me to stay right there with them as they play.
And that it the way we really live.
Messily together, loud-too-often, huge completely scratched dining table covered in pencils, dishes piled in the sink, haphazard tents constructed in the bedrooms, books scattered over the coffee table, random toys in the hall, a sometimes huge clean washing pile, and a notice board covered with 'important' things.
That is how my beautiful family really lives. And as I look at the joy and contentedness in their faces, I realise that although I still have a little way to go on the journey of simplifying, they are completely happy right where we are now.
Clearing the clutter and remembering to love people and use things (not the other way around), will continue to be an important focus. We just won't lose focus of who we actually are, and what our life is really like in the process.
I may not perfectly implement the task of minimising, and my children may not grow to completely value simplicity.
But they will clearly remember that people come first. And that things are simply tools for living a happy, fun, meaningful, sometimes slightly wild-and-crazy, life.
Time to look at the gorgeous, real, seriously messy-and-all-about-the-fun family I have. Time to smile and think about real solutions that are all about life as it really is.
And above all, time for me to be grateful for the amazing life I lead, and house I am beyond blessed to call that very special word: home.
Jen.x
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