At the beginning of kinder 'news' was cute. With my first at school it was even a bit exciting. Jack loved it! Speaking in front of a group of people uninterrupted - wow! He is the reason teachers are so great at the line "Just one more thing and then its time for questions." I'm sure that even then he probably had to be cut off when giving his answers. Jack would "um" and "ahh" about his topic of choice at first and then, when a list of topics came home, I barely gave it a glance. He could speak on any given topic. At length. Unendingly.
You see schools send home a list of weekly topics beginning in kindergarten, mostly to help children further investigate topics they are learning about at school. And perhaps partly because everyone ends up bored to tears after 24 talks based on the Lego movie. It is also put in place especially for those students who hate public speaking and seem to have nothing to say. My middle girls. Only they have plenty to say. Just not to the whole class at one time. Public speaking will probably never be their thing and I'm completely OK with that. After all, not all jobs require outgoing people and leaders need quiet followers too.
So unlike the years of Jack sailing through news and speeches, our weeks are now often guided by the news topic of the week. There are sighs of relief all round on 'free topic' week. Lucy grabs a toy as she leaves the house ('showing news' is easy) or if we forget she comes home complaining that she had to do 'talking news' (more accurately titled 'miming news' because no one can hear her.)
This term Lucy's class has news topics based on transport. I silently cheered reading the first topic she has to talk about is using different forms of transport while on holidays. Yay! I can relax and say "go and write." We even have props! So I pinned the note to the notice board and went to have a cuppa.
Then Izzy walked in from the mudroom holding a note. I forgot about Year 3 speeches. First topic: write a speech on a natural, built or heritage feature in the local community. Visuals encouraged. Now Isabel loves writing. But she also very much prefers to write from experience, so I knew this would mean a family day out. Pushing aside the long list of things I was excited about finding time to do over the weekend, I put on a smile and told her this would be so much fun! Where to go?
The Kiama Blowhole was her choice and soon everyone was excited. I'll admit I was a little afraid that the kids would find it boring after such a huge and exciting holiday, but they had a ball. Running around finding the best viewing points, discussing how people could have died due to unsafe practices and guessing when the next lot of water would shoot up. We looked at the lighthouse, walked all around and then discussed where to next.
As it turns out, I forgot snacks. Mum of 5 with not a single drink bottle or snack in the entire car. To make matters worse I also forgot to bring money or a card. Thankfully Craig had $17, but a cafe was out of the question with that amount, so off to find Woolies it was. A few u turns and a busy car park later and we had what we needed. In our search we came across a great park by the beach, that I had not been to before, so we stopped to eat and play.
As the kids finished up the unplanned lamingtons and ran off enthusiastically to play, I sat on the park bench and just watched. Daisy in awe of the water, dragging Craig toward the beach. The older kids laughing with everything in them, collapsing to the ground, only to get up and chase again. The completely contented smiles, as they jumped and swung and encouraged each other higher. Nowhere else existed for them in that moment. And I smiled knowing nowhere else existed for me either.
I'm all too aware that I'm great at the 'doing'. I can plan. Oh I can plan! I can organise. And I can see things through to the end, making sure nothing is missed. Doing is easy.
But I'm also all too aware that I find the 'being' hard.
Just sitting and enjoying the moment. Stopping. Really stopping and doing nothing. Not willing a moment to pass so I can get back to finishing something. Not sending my mind to the 5000 tasks I have waiting for me at any given time. This is such a huge challenge for me. But it's a challenge that I need to take up because my family won't remember the organising. They won't remember the planning or the washing, or the cleaning, or the dinner, or the endless amounts of vacuuming. My family will remember me looking into their eyes and smiling. My children will remember me watching first bike rides, jumping on the trampoline and sitting in my lap listening to stories. They will remember hugs and me holding their hand and listening, as they tell me about playground dramas. They will remember me just being with them. Just being. I hope.
Today I didn't finishing making curtains for the bathroom. The vacuuming didn't get done and at some point tonight I will get to cleaning the kitchen. But Lucy found three feathers. Jack rode his skateboard all around the park as I watched. Isabel experienced the Kiama Blowhole first hand. Henry climbed really high. Daisy visited her favourite place, the beach. And we all watched as a rainbow appeared. Sometimes gold is found where I least expect it. In a park, with unplanned lamingtons and learning how to just be.
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